Granapple55
 
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Background
Birthday: November 24
Gender: Female
Location:
Michigan
Hometown(s):
Washington
Michigan
Oklahoma
France
Illinois
Wisconsin
Minnesota
Quote:
We are spirit having a physical experience
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About Me

A new chapter (decade) has started. This is a new venue for me. Retired again and looking for things to keep me busy, even if it is just words. For awhile I thought I might make 90, but second thoughts now. The head thinks young, the body says "Just a minute there". So, my paycheck has stopped now; thank heavens for my monthly stipend. I can keep body and soul together. As far as gas in the car, that is another story. The trips may get a little shorter as the gas goes higher and higher.

Interests:
My interests? I'm curious about a lot of things, people, places. How things work, and maybe how to get things to work. I like to learn new things. Often, I drive my friends to distraction with "How come? why not? and what if?" Sometimes, my two cents worth, is two cents too many for them. But, they take me with a grain of salt. I can usually get their remote to work again. I like to read, enjoy some television, involved with Master Gardeners for the past six years. Can't step on a shovel anymore, but dabble with the no till garden approach. I like to problem solve. Love the Google to find answers. Amazing what one can find and how quick. Even old recipes pop up when the right ingredients are listed.
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A FATHER LOST TONITE

 

 

A FATHER LOST TONIGHT
 
My sons lost their father tonight and my daughter, a step-father. I had left and lost him thirty years ago.
 
I first met him when I was working at a small hamburger joint. He and his car pool would stop for coffee and breakfast on their 80 mile plus drive to the mine. Back in those days I would merrily flirt as I poured their coffee.
 
He was about as tall as I. A medium sized man, blonde with brown eyes, and a manner about him that I liked. Those days, a lot of bars, a lot of dancing and talking and loving went on. “Yabba, Dabba Doo” was his happy shout then.
 
He was a scrapper. More times than not, and weekly, the fight would move outside the bar. One drinking buddy or another would get his goat and the brawl was on. I would sit fearfully in the car. That’s when I first learned to put my mind in another place, so as not to be scared that he would get hurt. He never did.
 
His inner arms were scarred with cigarette burns, evidence of “who is tougher” games played in various bars. He had been in Korea and had tales of burning tents in the snow and demotion because of a binge and breaking all the barracks windows. Hard liquor made him crazy.
 
He was not physically abusive to me. If he had a paycheck he would give me the money. He was a hard worker and a neat man. He liked to hunt, fish, snowmobile, drink and smoke. He cut wood, mowed lawns, and plowed the biggest driveway I ever saw. When he didn’t have a job, he would look for work. He liked beer.
 
He wrecked more cars than I could count. I put it at seven or eight while we were married. He rarely got hurt. He also had to bury a vehicle in mud at least one time a year. Really get it stuck in the clay. I think it was therapeutic for him to work at the unstuck part. 
 
When we were a family, his thought was to provide food and shelter. As the boys grew, he spent little time teaching them.  We no longer did things together, we no longer spoke, and we were no longer affectionate. After we separated, I heard him say to another “I didn’t know what love was (or perhaps it was) how to love”. And I believe that was so.  Neither did I at the time. We did not have those tools. If you were not taught love, how can you share love?
 
I can look back now and wonder what would have happened if I had stayed a little longer? Tried a little harder? There are so many paths we can take, so many different destinations. He was a good man, he tried. So did I. We did the best we could with what knowledge we had. We succeeded in some things, failed at other things. We grow older and wiser with age.
 
I see him in my fine, strong sons and their sons and daughters. The color of an eye, hair and gait is there. The toughness, the kindness, and the stubborn streak too.  My daughter had a step-father who provided for her and cared for her and loved her as one of his own. That legacy he left in spite of himself. He did the best he could. God Bless.
 
 
Added: August 19, 2008
Views: 1781 | Comments: 15 | Bookmarks: 0
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  Comments (40)  
9AbeeA
9AbeeA says:

Hello Granapple55,
What's been happening lately with you in Michigan. Here in Tennessee September has brought slightly cooler weather with lower humidity. The days go by a lot faster as I get older so don't get nearly as much accomplished as I used to. My small vegetable garden keeps me pretty busy but things are starting to wind down now.
NinaB
Posted: September 2, 2009 9:55AM EDT
lightstar
lightstar says:

What a nice tribute to a good man. You did the best you could with what you had at that point in time. No one is to blame. God does have a plan for everyone and every thing.. I really do believe this.
There's an American Monk that says "Everything at this very moment in time is happening exactly as it's meant to be."
It's all good, there's no doubt about it.. because 'God' is in control.
We are put together for a reason in through the seasons of our lives. Some stay and some move on.. this is the way it's meant to be.
Meanwhile, we live in the moment.. help one another.. and learn our lessons of life.
Posted: August 12, 2009 12:02PM EDT
Shelbell
Shelbell says:

Hi,

I hope all is well with you. It is a rather bleek day here in Texas, looks like it is trying to rain; my lawn needs it! Take care and hope to chat with you soon
Posted: February 15, 2009 10:50AM EST
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